Wednesday, January 31, 2007

The Idea Jar is Temporarily Empty

Not a lot of blog-worthy happenings in the life of fridaynightgirl right now.

Sleep
Work
Eat (occasionally)
Rehearsal
Sleep
Repeat

Two and a half weeks until we open She Loves Me. We're reviewing the finale tonight. YIKES! I don't know why this scene makes me so antsy. It just does, I suppose. Probably because the person I'd really like to be kissing is 7500 miles away. *shrug* K suggested I spray some of J's cologne on Georg and see if that helped any....

Don't get me wrong. The guy playing Georg is funny, charming, tall and has a great voice. But, as my mother pointed out this morning, he's not a redneck. *giggle* I'm talking about one of the boys - would rather play outside than anything else. In short - this guy... *grin* Look at all that mud. You can tell he had fun. Not that I'd let all that mud into my house, mind you, but I still think it's cute.


I should have some pictures soon. I know I still have to upload pics from New Years and our Gala - I promise I haven't forgotten. I tell myself that I'm going to do it when I get home from rehearsal but that never happens. I usually just collapse into a heap on my bed and pray for a coma for a few hours until it's time to get up and do it all over again.


Oh, on an up note - it looks like K isn't moving to Seattle after all! YIPPEEE!!! Her hubby-to-be is moving home to Texas next month (I think) so they'll probably stay here. Now, where in Texas they'll live remains to be seen but at least it won't be Seattle!


Now if I could just get my little brother and sister-in-law to move home!


I have to have my hair cut - AGAIN! It's already grown an inch - in just a month! I'm going to have her cut a little extra off so it will stay short enough that I won't have to have another cut before the show is over.



Then, once the show is over, I'm going to grow it as long and as fast as I can before I see J this summer. If it continues to grow about an inch a month, it'll grow six inches and be back down past my shoulders by then. It won't be as long as it was before I cut it, but it will be back to that length by my next birthday - he should be home by then.


It's four o'clock and I wish I could have a nap before rehearsal. Just an hour. Gosh, that would be so nice. But, I suppose that's too much to hope for. Well, maybe Friday night.


I'm sorry these posts lately have been a little fluffy. I'm just feeling a little low on good blog fodder. As my very dorky friend Joe told me, when in doubt SPAM. *giggle*


Later, gators.




(yes, Joe, I know I use this as an avatar on messenger. I think it's funny, though... Gosh, I need some sleep.)

Monday, January 29, 2007

Getting Off the Rollercoaster


I realized Sunday morning, when I woke up with this sick feeling of dread sitting on my chest like a 60 pound weight that I'd had enough of this irrational fear. I resolved a long time ago never again to allow fear to hold so much sway over my life.


I confessed this fear. Sure, it's natural and not a thing was wrong about me being concerned for J. He is, after all, "in harm's way" and I love him. Of course I'm going to be worried about him. BUT, it is not ok to feel a constanst sense of dread. That reveals a basic mistrust in God's protection and an unwillingness to be in line with God's plan; even if I don't understand it.


I asked God to forgive me for doubting His provision for both J and me. I asked Him to continue to watch over J and to help me keep my eye on the ball.


I laid down after church because I'd given myself a sick headache from the last several days of all of that agonizing. When I woke up and checked my email, ther were THREE messeges from J.


He is alive. I know where he is. I know that he has made provisions for somebody to contact me in the event that something bad should happen. I know he loves and misses me.


As I went to rehearsal last night and tonight, I felt back to my "old" self. Focused, secure in myself and in firm control of my own emotions. Am I still worried about J? Of course I am. I will continue to worry until he steps off that plane, next year. But am I going to allow that worry to destroy my peace of mind? Not anymore.


God is either who He says He is or he's not. If he is, then I have nothing to worry about. If He's not, then it doesn't matter anyway.


On that note, I'll sign off. Go0dnight, friends.


ps. Rehearsal was great. We did "Where's My Shoe" and "Ice Cream." I just love that scene. It's really the first time that we get to see Georg and Amalia having "moments" and where we begin to think that there might be a happy ending after all. *sigh* I just love this show.

Saturday, January 27, 2007

Running Around Like...

Well, you know the phrase.

It's been quite a week. Work this week has been totally nuts because our annual fundraiser was tonight. We've all put in some extra hours getting ready for it and here it was. It was beautiful. The girls did a fabulous job and everything was fantastic. I can't wait to see how much was raised.

Rehearsals are getting intense. Every night this week until 10:30pm. I'm beat. It's coming along, though.

I haven't heard from J since the 21st. There have been a staggering number of casualties and we're still waiting on the Army to release the names of seven JUST FROM TODAY. *gulp*

Oh, Lord, I hope he's safe. All this worrying about him (which does nothing but give me a headache) has worn me out. I remind myself that God is in control of this situation and He already knows the outcome. I ask myself if I believe that God is who He says He is or not. If I do, then I have to trust Him to know what's best. If I don't, then I have bigger problems than worrying about J.

I'm beat, y'all. I know this is a terrible update and promise to do better this week. Now that Gala is over, I can breathe again at work. Later, folks.

Sunday, January 21, 2007

Pass the Kleenex



So, last night, K and I get home from working a donor reception and an OnStage show and decided that we were in the mood for a good cry. Girls, you know what I'm talking about.


I am so thankful to have K. Sure, she drives me nuts. Sometimes the seven year difference in our age blares our differences at us. Sometimes my natural cynicism and tendency to over-indulge in speaking before thinking and her soft heart and tendency to take everything personally totally clash and you'd never be able to tell that we are best friends. But we are. She is the most tender-hearted person I've ever met and that makes her sensitive to the needs of others. She is one of the most self-less people I've ever met. She loves with her whole heart. How can puts up with me I'll never figure out. But she does. And, I will always be thankful.


So, J has been gone a little more than a month. I've done a pretty good job of not dealing with my grief and my worry - until last night. I don't know what it was that made me realize that I needed a good, hard cry but I did. K seemed to be in a similar mood so we decided to pick a movie that would guarantee a good sobfest.


What did we watch? We Were Soldiers.


This is such a good movie. From IMDB.com:
In a place soon to be known as The Valley of Death, in a small clearing called landing zone X-Ray, Lt. Colonel Hal Moore (Mel Gibson) and 400 young fathers, husbands, brothers, and sons, all troopers from an elite American combat division, were surrounded by 4,000 North Vietnamese soldiers. The ensuing battle was one of the most savage in U.S. history. We Were Soldiers Once...And Young is a tribute to the nobility of those men under fire, their common acts of uncommon valor, and their loyalty to and love for one another.

Needless to say, I cried so hard it made my head hurt. I cried myself to sleep; something I've not done in a good long time. Once I started, I just couldn't stop. It was like the last few months of worrying about him leaving and then his actual leaving and waiting on pins and needles for that next email that lets me know he's safe all caught up with me last night.
Today I feel better.

Friday, January 19, 2007

Happy Birth Day, Mommy


31 years ago, my mother gave me the greatest gift EVER. About this time of day, a 19 year old girl was giving birth in an Army hospital in Germany. To me.

31 years later, I'm 5'10" with red hair and green eyes, big ideas and even bigger opinions. My mother gave me the gift of birth but she also gave me the gifts of faith, humor, compassion and a heart big enough to survive in this often very cruel world.

31 years later, I am thrilled at the close relationship I have with my mother. I am delighted at the bond forming between Munchkin and her Nana.

So, today, Mommy.... Happy Birth Day. Who has more fun than us?
NOBODY.

Monday, January 15, 2007

Another Icy Picture

This is at work. Yes, I'm at work. All. Stinkin. Day. *pout*

Ice Day


The roads don't look too bad today but Munchkin is out of school and all the ways to work promise to be pretty treacherous. Plus, the weatherman is predicting sleet and snow for much of the day. All these things add up to a day at home.

It was neat to hear the crunch of frozen leaves under my feet as I ventured outside to snap some pictures of frozen branches. I have a thing about winter trees. I just love trees.

I think the cold weather is getting to my brain. I think I'll head into the living room where K is playing Sly Cooper 2. Anna Karenina is still FAR from unfinished and I've picked up another Judy Garwood to breeze through today.

If the roads don't get too bad, I might try and go to the office later today to work a little on this weekend.

Sunday, January 14, 2007

BBRRRR!!!!

When winter finally arrives in Texas, it does it in style. It is C-O-L-D!! It rained six inches yesterday, if the accumulated water in my birdfeeder was any indicator.



Rehearsal has been cancelled tonight and tomorrow night, church was cancelled tonight and, in all likelyhood, we'll not be working or going to school tomorrow. Now, in most parts of the country, these temperatures would probably bring snow. But here, in Texas, we just get sleet and ice. I have yet to see Texans handle icy roads well so, basically, the entire state shuts down.

The good news is that we'll get a day off. The bad news is that we still have a show and donor reception at work on Saturday. More work for me to do in a rush. Joy. *grin* That's ok, I probably wouldn't have started on the program tomorrow anyway. I think I still need the program order from the artists.

Well, I'm going to take advantage of the time home and do some laundry. Oh, and make spaghetti and meatballs. yum.

Later, gators. Stay frosty!

Friday, January 12, 2007

The Most Important Question

Last night, we were trying to decide what to eat for dinner. I suggested spaghetti and Munchkin chimes in "AND MEATBALLS!!!" (yes, at the top of her lungs. Hey, she likes Mom's meatballs) "No, baby, I can't do that because I have to be at rehearsal in an hour."

*pouting ensues*

So, all three of us, K, Munchkin and I are all standing in front of the freezer... (just in case the contents might be different from last night)

I had no more finished reading the label on one of those meals in a bag skillet thingies - “Garlic Chicken and Vegetables,” and Munchkin said, “GROSS.” Gross? Where did that come from? As I then set about trying to cajole her into agreeing to eat said meal by describing the lovely chicken (she loves chicken!), snow peas and carrots (two of her favorites), she’s making gagging sounds in the background. It was absolutely the funniest thing she’s done all week. We had tuna sandwiches for dinner.



I'm going to make spaghetti AND MEATBALLS tomorrow.

The Benefits of Messiness?

According to THIS St Louis Post-Dispatch article, there may be benefits to being messy.

I found this article interesting and certainly validating because, hey, sometimes things just pile up. Especially working all day and then having church, community, events at work and then the play vying for my time. But, as I've talked about here, a tidy house just makes me feel better. Things are straight and orderly. The house may not always be uber-clean but stuff is put away, cabinets have been wiped down and the floors have been swept. *sigh* Ah, happiness.

What do you think? I'm interested in your opinions on the article. Go read it and then come back here and leave your comments.

Yes, I'm a dork. I know. Hey, every once in a while it's nice to de-lurk.. Don't you agree? After all, it is still National DeLurking Week (who made that "National" anyway? Probably Google - they are taking over the world.).